If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize