she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
