with your own penis?
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Drunk is a universal language darling
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
