hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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