I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
