your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
