So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
