I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
