Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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