And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
