just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
