Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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