Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
you inspire me to be a worse person
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
