remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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