I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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