I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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