so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
