True but thats because hes a fetus.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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