It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
