Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
