I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
