Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Can't talk, ducks in the car
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
