brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
