she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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