You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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