Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
