there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
