You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
