I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize