I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize