office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize