whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Randomize
