Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
