I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
two words: eviction party
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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