dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize
