He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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