i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
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