I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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