I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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