I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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