so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
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