just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
