would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
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