Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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