I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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