He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
