I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
