You're completely useless in the revolution.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
