that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize