Dual....:-)
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Come on in and take your pants off
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