I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I just want to make out with him forever
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I'm like, not good at living.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
